Musta made it comfy in there!

this picture was taken about a week and a half ago i think. I am now creepin up on 36 weeks and measuring at 45+ at the doctor today. Dilated to 1 so basically means nothing is going on in there. Not effaced even 1%. Im really thinking if no pre-eclampsia then im going all the way to November 9th!
There is a lot of protein in my urine as well as some blood. I guess that is no good so they gave me a bucket to collect ALL my pee in for 24 hours. How fun! Plus, the bonus is that i get to keep that bucket of urine in the fridge. How gross. Anyway, they also took blood work today and tested for Strep B. The blood work and urine collection is to check for pre-eclampcia. My blood pressure is awesome just like always but the swelling and protein are also indicators of problems so they are checking it out.
Im only 2.5 weeks away from the d date so im not really worried if the test says i have it. Im sure they will just deliver the babies Im getting very anxious to see what they look like and what their personalities are - wondering how the dogs will react to them and the kids as well. Wondering how life will be with 2 lil ones in the house. Not the lack of sleep or the noise, just the basic teen-stuff that goes on here and where we always are going to will be luggin 2 car seats and lil humans around to everything! Im sure it will take some adjusting but we will get thru it i am sure.
I was released from the REI specialist in IL so that is nice, no more trips out there. I feel like i should send them a gift or something for what they have helped us get.
I am pretty ready for babies - as ready as i can get i suppose. Its not like they really need much at birth so what we have here is more than enuf at this point. I am too exhausted and sore to do anything else so i figure i will organize and re-organize after they are born since im not going back to work for quite some time.
Looking forward to being able to spend time with all 4 of my kids while i am a stay at home momma!

Cant believe Im here

Its been a very long time since I've updated! I have been off of work now for 3 weeks I believe and I have been to soooo many doctor appoitments its silly! Maddox's tumor is bigger now than it originally was but it doesnt seem to be effecting him at all. No edema for him - plenty for me, none for him. Which is a-ok. I would rather not have any myself since it is very uncomfy, but i will take it instead of him. I ma 34 weeks now and its hard to do anything. Its hard to get up, hard to sit, hard to lay down, harder to walk and bending over or squatting at all is completley out of the question. The heartburn is crazy and most of the time the scripted zantac doesnt touch it. The throwing up in my mouth is getting very, very old.
I have got to be up at least 60 pounds at this point and I am hoping that a lot of it is swelling, water weight. Hey, a girl can dream, right? :-)
THe doctor has never once said anything about the weight issue, which surprises me since most docs are all up your a** about gaining too much. I knew i liked this doc b4, but now i like him even more!!!
Nursery is pretty much done, well, done enuf that babies could sleep in there if need be. Cribs and up and bedding is in place. Walls are painted, glider rocker is in there, clothes are washed and put away. I have bottles ready, diapers, wipes and butt cream ready to go and Harmony has painted one of the four monkeys already. She will have plenty of time to do the rest. I like the way the room looks, it is smaller and smaller every day but seems cozy and I really think Maddux and Alyssa will like being in there together.
At the last check, 3 weeks ago they were both 3lbs 7 oz. I will have another weight check on friday along with the biophysical ultrasound. I am hoping at least a pound or more. Shooting for 4.5 each (or more). They have given me a D-day. If i do not go into spontanious labor they will enduce me or c-section me (depending on how the babies are positioned) on November 9th. Its a Tuesday and happens to be my in laws anniversary. I really dont think i will make it quite that long but I never in a million years thought I would have made it this far so what do I know. Bradyen's guess is November 1st or 3rd. Harmony's guess is October 31st or November 4th. With the way that I feel I would say no more than 2 weeks, but maybe that is the pain and discomfrot talking.........
I think that Halloween would be fun but any day they come and are healthy is a-ok with me.

Shoulda seen it coming

I had a 2 doc appts on tuesday. One OB and a growth scan with the peri. The Ob was first and all is well, greet HB's, weight gain and all that good stuff so i go upstairs to the u/s with the perientologist. They go thru the scans and i still make them show me heartbeats every time, even tho just 10 min prior to that i was hearing it at the OB. Anyway, i see this thing on Maddux's placenta and then i see the tech measure it. I knew something was up but they are not normally the person who says anything about it. The doc does. Now, i don't always see the doctor there usually they say "ok, all is great, see ya in 2 weeks". Not this time. She says they are done and that the doctor would be in shortly. SO now I know i was right that something wasnt right. I thought it as a bleed but it looked weird. It was a diff color than the rest of the placenta. Doc comes in and says that it is a tumor on his placenta. OY! Not what i wanted to hear. I was all ready for bed rest and some worry but not a frickin tumor talk. Not cool. I guess sometimes (and of course in my case it does happen) blood forms - kinda like a fibroid in the uterus, which i have several, and then stay around. Nothing you can do about it, nothing you can do to cause it.
He didn't seem worried and told me that i shouldn't be either, right.......
He said that what can happen is baby can be affected by it and get all bloated and retain a ton of water. If that happens they need to deliver. They checked for that and saw none, they also did not see any heart failure or issues with heart. Good news, but the tumor was not there 4 weeks ago when i was there. So you just never know what can happen. He said that it was worth them watching and me knowing about, but didn't want me to worry. Sure......
Im actually much more calm about it than one would think who knows me. Somehow i feel like it will be ok and so will he. I don't know if its denial or if i just have a motherly feeling about it. I am gonna go with the motherly feeling.
They are each 3lbs 1oz now and in the 38th percentile, which bothered me cuz they have always been in the 50th but they all said that is normal and even more normal for twins come the end since they run out of room. I am measuring 38+ weeks right now and i am 30 weeks so I may just believe them on that part.

Shower is this weekend and im getting excited, glad to be off of work now. Feeling more and more sore and exhausted but blood pressure is a-ok.

I guess I'm not immune

Turns out that I can in fact have the rhogam shot. The antibodies that showed up on my last blood test were there cuz they were left-over from the last rhogam shot I had when I was bleeding in this pregnancy. Yippie, so now I get to go back to the doctor again today. I was at my old RE’s office yesterday morning getting another IVIg treatment and I have 3 appts next week.

Friday is quickly approaching and as much as I am looking forward to being off of work I am pretty sad to be giving up such a great job. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for my great job/boss. He knew everything we were going thru and never ever made me feel like all the time off I took would put my job in jeopardy. That lessened the stress of all the appts and such.
Very much looking forward to being a SAHM. I'm also glad that I will be able to cover at work when the "new me" goes on Vacation or has a sick kid, appt or whatever. I'm sure that will be a very nice break from home stuff. Taking a shower, putting real clothes on, giving someone else the joy of changing 20 diapers that day, not getting puked on for an entire 8 hour period..... sounds magical doesnt it? :-)

I have a few lunch dates over the next couple weeks, its gonna be fun to be off, even if I have to order bread and water, lol.
I have all these things that I want to do while I am off and before the babies come, however, my mind and my body don’t always want to do the same thing. I want to freezer cook, and make tons of things so I don’t have to cook for quite awhile but I know that just the grocery shopping will do me in so I have to be smart. I want to finish the nursery, but again, not so sure my body will hold up.
The doc said that most twin mommas stop working at about 28 weeks, I will be 30 so I feel good about that. I guess the pressure of the babies can cause pre-term or something. So with being home he says to do something then rest with my feet up, take naps, etc and I should be fine. And with having the whole day to do this stuff I can only hope that it will be fine. Now, even tho I dont do physical things here at work, just having to be here is difficult. Then all the after work things with kids school and such - anyway, being off will be very nice.

I have been taking some sort of injection for pretty much 3 years now and its getting to me. Today I needed to take my Lovenox injection and I just couldn’t do it. I looked at it several times and then put it back each time. I know it stays in my system for a few days so waiting til I get home wont make a difference. Its just weird that its hard to stick myself. It doesn’t hurt so I’m not so sure what my problem is.

Oh well, regardless, happy to be injecting and running to doctor appts.... very, very happy to be where I sit. Last year at this time I didnt think having a baby was possible - now I get to have two more. Won the lottery on that one!

At least I’m not making this up!

When people say “how are you doing” I usually say “ok” or "alright" cuz who really wants to hear how you are really feeling? They are being polite by asking so I’m not gonna keep them around telling all my “issues”. However, the being exhausted one most days I do bring up but I feel like such a fool. I mean, geesh, how can I STILL be exhausted...... at some point I should have some energy. I don’t.
6 weeks ago I went to the doc for normal pregnancy bloodwork and in that was iron level, CBC, gestational diabetes, etc. My iron was low, very low so they put me on iron supplements for the anemia. Didn’t care for the side effects but super excited about the possibility of having energy. Yeah, not happening, not even close. So over the last 6 weeks I have felt not even a burst of energy - I can drink coffee or a soda and natta. So today when I had to go back to the doc, yet again, for them to suck my blood (to figure out this Rhogam Shot dilemma) I asked about my results from yesterday. I passed the GD test which I was shocked about. I was totally ready for them to hand me the finger pricker thingy and a completely new diet plan but nope, passed it just fine. Great! However, the 6 weeks on the iron meds has done nothing, nothing at all. Still super low, like maybe a point higher than it was. I was kinda relieved to be honest. At least there is a reason for this exhaustion, other than twin pregnancy and my old a** age. I have been pregnant before but that was ages ago so I would just chalk this up to me being 12 years older and this being a twin pregnancy, good to know I don’t have to feel like this. The doc was not in when I was there (lunch, how dare he!) so I assume he will just have me take 2 of the iron pills daily instead of 1 every day but waiting on those instructions.
I know I should eat more meat, red meat at that but nothing tastes good anymore. I can eat prob 1 real meal a day but the rest of the time I just graze on little stuff. Red meat is the last thing I want to chew on. Makes me sick to my stomach thinking about it. Every once in awhile I crave a big burger but only the kind you can get out, not the ones you make at home. There isn't much room in there anymore and it seems as tho I have developed a MEGA milk allergy in the last 4 weeks. Its awful, goes right thru me and makes me miserable. So eating cereal (which was one thing I did enjoy) is out of the question unless I wanna feel like crap. The Greek Yogurt that I was getting protein from is not sitting well either - not as awful as drinking milk or having milk in cereal tho.
I have always had a problem with milk, lactose, but when I am pregnant I can down the stuff no problem. Up until a few weeks ago that was the case with this pregnancy too.
Oh well, kinda excited to up the meds in hopes that I will be able to do something once and awhile :-)

I may be ready to take off the necklace....... maybe not

I have been wearing the same necklace since the IVF round started, I have tried to take it off twice now in the last 3 weeks. Its still on, however, I think I can do it this weekend. Its so silly but when I go to take it off my heart starts to pound as if I’m doing something “wrong” so I leave it. I think its gonna have to be like a band-aid and just take it off and be done with it. We shall see what happens this weekend.... stay tuned!
Today I had 2 appts, one with the OB and one with the Peri. Had a cervical check, all is well with cervix as well as babies. Got a great pic of lil Maddux but Alyssa still being camera shy. We could have gotten a great shot of her booty in 3D tho!
I am 28 weeks now and measuring at 31, normal. Swelling and pain, normal. Not sleeping, normal. Being exhausted and having a hard time breathing, normal. Puking in my mouth, normal. Time for my Rhogam shot, normal.... or so I thought. Nope, apparently I have built up antibodies to the injection. Great. So they didn’t know whether or not to give it to me (my reg doc wasnt there). Apparently if they gave it to me they run a very high risk of the babies developing severe anemia, if they don’t give it and they end up with Matt’s blood type (A+, damn perfectionist) then there could be issues as well. Then if I don’t take it and end up getting pregnant again (which I am not wanting or planning but you never know) then the baby wouldn’t be able to survive since my body wouldn’t know what to do with it I guess. I’m not really clear on all this but now they have to run my blood again to check my titers(?) to make sure they are not too high and if they decide to give me the injection then they will have to run that blood test to make sure it doesn’t spike cuz then its dangerous to the babies.
It’s all very strange, but typical of this ride I suppose. My body likes to fight stuff off, till the bitter end. If its something that is helpful, it will try to F it up anyway. Apparently my body is really good at fighting and building antibodies and such. Fabulous. Couldn’t just get the shot and be done with it. Nope, not gonna happen. So now I have to go BACK to the hospital and get the shot. I’m trying not to take more time off of work since next Friday is my last day but just seems like there is always something else I have to do. Roger has got to think I am lying most times. I also have to make an appt for another IVIg treatment this week, not so sure that’s gonna happen. Each treatment takes at least 1.5 hours and they don’t start them until 8am - I start work at 8:30am.
Babies are running out of room in there, they were all squished up in there today. I have another scan 2 weeks from today along with an appt in IL at the specialist that week, then 2 weeks from then I will be seeing the OB weekly AND the peri 2x a week. Good thing they are in the same hospital! I have a non-stress test and some bio-something or other where they check their breathing and something else. How neat, I will be able to watch them breath! The things that they can and will do now, just amazing!

Im so much better, but....

Yesterday was my 3 week check up with the specialist in IL, well, actually, with the tech in IL. I almost never see the doc. Regardless, everything looks great and babies were boppin around. I have come a long, long, long way since the beginning about feeling more comfy about being pregnant and really believing that by the end of the year I will be a mother of 4. I still have my moments tho. Today, even after seeing them cruzin around just yesterday I got a wave of panic come over me. It was strange, it came out of nowhere, but it was strong. It was only strong for a few min and then I was much more manageable. Now, I am fine. Its so weird. I also go thru these weird emotions about loving being pregnant cuz I can feel them moving around and they are always with me to then wanting this to be over so I can walk w/out pain and put on regular shoes again. My hands and feet actually hurt. My hands hurt when I bend my fingers, I often wonder if this is how heavier people feel or if it is just the swelling that makes it difficult to move them. Either way, I just bounce back and forth. I never missed being pregnant with Harmony and Brayden, but I feel like I may have some sadness after I deliver these two. Maybe cuz this is deff my last go round with this stuff, maybe cuz we worked so hard to get here and then its over or maybe just cuz I’m a hormonal mess. I never had a problem saying I was “done” after Brayden was born, however, I was not having my tubes tied. But as I was looking around, I still (12 years later) have a bin full of baby clothes from the kids, their crib and porta-crib. Sure doesnt sound like a lady who was “done” having kids, does it? The crib and porta-crib are probably death traps so we are not using them - so why did I keep them? I have no idea, but they are gone as of this past weekend and I was ok with seeing them go. Very strange! It was weird to see those things out and watch the kids help move them around or take them to the garbage. They used to use those things and I could still picture them doing so, yet they were the ones moving them around. I guess I’m just in a weird place right now, my teenagers helping me get ready for babies. I guess it happens more and more now but I am no Duggar so this is weird to me, lol.

Harmony got to feel Maddux kicking the other day, it was pretty cool to see her face light up when she actually felt him move, it was very obvious that he was kicking her. She is having some issues and a hard time dealing with the new babies so it sure was cool to see her smile.