Another round of Happy Tears

We had another u/s yesterday and got to see both babies thriving and those lovely flickering heartbeats. We got to see the whole in their heads where the brain will go, each of their spines and lil arm and leg buds for each of them. Absolutely amazing! I had a few tears, tears of joy this time but nothing like that time. At least I was able to keep my composure somewhat this time, lol.
Its crazy how much you can see at this point, I mean they aren’t any bigger than a blueberry.
She gave us a 3d pic which really looks like a blob for each of them but they are gorgeous nonetheless.
I asked for a due date and I need to make an appt with my OB. They don’t actually give “twin due dates” which I thought was weird but what do I know. They said my due date is Nov 22, 2010 but that they would be happy if I made it to the end of October. Lil pumpkins we shall have. Or lil turkeys if they feel like hanging out there longer. Either is fine by me.

My natural killer cells are not good news tho. They don’t want to give up the fight. Stupid things, just give up and be gone. You never want to hear your doc say “we just don’t see numbers that high here” or “we have a handful of patients that we have seen this on”, etc. Esp when she is using air quotes when she says “handful” ugh.
They should be under 12%, mine are 46%. Almost half - not cool. I did another double dose of the IVIg and they have me on the steroids still but she says that I have to wean eventually cuz its not safe to stay on them much longer and deff not past the 20 week mark. Then she started on about all the crap that can and will happen - toxemia, pre-eclampsia, bone density issues and then the best part was when she started talking about how once the babies are big enuf to fight off the Nkcells then they will attack my liver and such. Very nice. Its not like this is new to them so I’m not afraid she doesn’t know but she said she cant give me a permanent answer on how many more weeks of IVIg or steroids or medication I will be on cuz it’s a balance of everything and everyones body is different. Oy!
Isnt it funny how I am not afraid of what will happen to MY body but if something is said about the babies health I freak and over-react? Its gotta be a mom thing. I dunno but its strange.

TWO BABIES AND BOTH HAVE HEARTBEATS!!!

OMG, I cant remember a more exciting day - I felt like my heart was going to just fall right out of my body as I was waiting for her to say that all was ok. I don’t remember walking into the u/s room, or getting undressed but I do remember shaking while I was waiting. She saw the heartbeat #1 and then #2 b4 I did and I thought that was gonna be hard cuz I was looking and looking very hard!
I think the last time I felt that type of excitement or rush was when the kids were actually born. It was amazing. I shook the rest of the time I was there and when I got up to stand I thought my knees may buckle. It was a strange feeling. I don’t know what I was expecting, but I was in total shock.
Both babies have great HB right now, 120 and 124 which is fast, but very normal for a baby at this point. Baby B’s gestational sac is smaller than it should be but nobody seems to be really concerned about that since it is growing. I guess what they don’t want is for the baby to grow and not the sac cuz they baby would run out of room. We are so hoping that both babies continue to fight, grow and progress the way they should.
I cried, and cried a lot, at the ultrasound which is totally not like me. I never cried at the u/s that went badly. Its not that I don’t cry, I just don’t cry in front of people. The shower is my “break-down and lose it place” however I just couldn’t control it. The tears came and they didn’t let up the whole time. I even apologized to the u/s tech cuz I couldn’t believe I was letting go in front of her. Not a typically Chelsea response but that’s ok.

After all the excitement died down, I was exhausted. More exhausted than I think I have ever been. My body and brain could not do anything. I think I used up every ounce of energy before the u/s and then afterwards just being shaky and happy.
I started to think about how lucky we are right now and how happy I am right at this moment but then wondering why we got so “lucky” which is weird since for the last 3 years I have been saying how we deserve this. Its weird, once you are given something you then wonder if you are deserving. Its hard to explain.

Anyway, we can breathe for now, I will have an u/s every week to measure babies growth and make sure all is well. I had my blood drawn yesterday to see about the natural killer cells and to see if I need a treatment next week or if I can push it to every 2-3 weeks. It will all depend on what the blood-work says.

Im super bloated and my pants are really uncomfy so I try to wear stretch or the bellaband thingy which is very nice, obviously invented by a lady who was sick of not being able to wear regular clothes while preggo or post. Im not hungry but I can eat if that makes sense. I am just not interested in eating but don’t really have any aversions that would keep me from eating. I sure hope that I end up being one of those “lucky” ones who doesn’t end up with horrible morning sickness but only time will tell. I read that most twin preggos are sicker than dogs by now so I’m just hoping that isnt a bad sign. I don’t feel great, I have headaches pretty much all day and feel dizzy and a lil sick to my tummy from time to time but nothing crazy. I never threw up with either of the pregnancies with the kids, just felt crappy for a few months so maybe thats just how my body is. I did, however, GAIN over 80 pounds with each pregnancy - ouch!