I did something I shouldn’t have today at Target. I bought a baby thing. FOR SHAME! It is a small, softest thing you have ever felt, mini baby blanket. Its my fav color purple and I needed to have it. I have not bought anything (baby related for myself) since the 2nd IVF when I carried around 2 nuk's in my purse the whole cycle. I don’t even know where they are anymore.
I don’t buy baby things, mostly cuz I am a realist but also because it hurts too much to see the stuff after so many failed cycles but I just had to have this blanket - it says it’s a security blanket and I will be the one needing the security and will be sleeping with it. Silly, but true.
I think that it may give me some happiness during the cycle - something to remind me why we are doing this yet again, something to wipe the tears or either joy or pain after the cycle is over. Hopefully something to give to a baby of ours as well.
I just needed to have the blanket - I’d carry it around town if I didn’t think people would toss me in a straight jacket for it!